Talking with Jaimie earlier, I was reflecting on why a job search can feel so soul-draining. There are many contributing factors, no doubt, including the simple fact of hearing “no” over and over again. But one key bit I had not named before is: it is an enormous amount of work but all of the work feels futile.

For an interview where you get through a final round and get a “no”, it’s not unusual to have spent anywhere between 10 and 20 hours on that specific job — sometimes more, occasionally much more. When you get a “no”, that is time that is basically down the drain.

I can console myself a little that it is not 100% down the drain. It is practice for the next one, it might result in connections that could then turn into a job later, etc. — and those are true enough, so far as they go. But the simple reality is that for most of us doing a job search, most of the time we spend on any given job that doesn’t pan out is just lost time.

Given the many other things we could and would like to be doing with our lives, well: no surprise that it can feel so soul-wearying! It is dreary, difficult work without any reward whatsoever (even financial): exactly the kind of toil that is most loathsome to all of us.